Six Ways to Romance

I had house guests this weekend. One of the younger ones mentioned that she liked my magnetic word board on the refrigerator. I began to tell her why we have it there- it’s a sign to remind us of our responsibility to love one another outwardly. Here’s how it works, along with Five Other Tips for keeping (or rekindling) the romance in your life.

1. Tell them what they mean to you. The magnetic word board is just a few dozen words, separate magnets, which float on the fridge. We, my husband and I, take turns writing a love note to one another. It can be three words or 20. It can be concrete or abstract. But, it must be heart-felt. He may write” you are my soul’s dream”. I read it and when I am ready to write him one, usually within a few days, I will return the love with a message of my own. Mine may be, “I adore our passion and kisses”. Simple. Yet, wildly necessary in this busy day-to-day life we all lead. Tell people how you feel about them- often.


2. Schedule a night away. Pick a place that you know s/he has always wanted to go. Or, choose to revisit a place that was meaningful to you as a couple. Book it today- even if it’s not for a few months. Make sure s/he knows that you want to do things to make them happy.


3. Schedule the harder talks. Don’t make every day and every conversation about a sore topic or a tough discussion. Make sure the joy outweighs the pain. Plan it and keep it limited. Show your partner that you love them, respect your life with them and want the rough spots to be as controlled as possible. No one wants to be married to a nag. And, I think it’s easy to be a nag if you don’t keep it in perspective. Is this issue really a deal breaker for you? If not, keep it real- and manageable.


4. Kiss and play passionately. You aren’t siblings. You are lovers. Play the part.


5. Have a His or Hers Day. Make one day a week about them. Only about them. Let them know that they choose what the activity is or what the menu is. They’ll do the same for you when they see how it feels.


6. Reflect. Imagine what life would be like without them. Try to imagine who would fill their shoes if they weren’t there. Realize the gift they are to you. Be thankful to have someone to share your life with. No one is perfect. You certainly aren’t. Celebrate each other as the wonderful individuals you are.

Happy loving.