6 Tips to A Better Job

I am so fortunate to work with such innovative clients. Yes, some of my clients are looking for work. Others are looking for opportunity… Opportunity to leave their current positions in pursuit of jobs or lifestyles that will be more fulfilling.

Now I know what you are thinking, “Lisa, why on earth would they choose to do that in this climate?” Well, because they can. You can too. Believe it or not the sky isn’t falling. Jobs are out there. Opportunities exist.

Most people will opt to complain about the market and allow the excuse to limit their potential. I don’t have those folks as clients, nor would I want them.

In the last two months I’ve had two clients choose to leave full-time, lucrative careers. One left to pursue her dream job, still in sales, but a far more risky and niche market. The other opted to pursue part-time work and focus on her family life. She did that with almost a year of thought and preparation.

Here is how you can find a better job… or dare I say “opportunity”

• Take a hard look at how you are living. What are your income needs? What expenditures do you have that you must continue to carry? Are you fulfilled in your current role/s?
  
• Identify your dreams. What would you like to do or not do with your time?
  
• Create a plan and a timeline for change. Map your dreams onto a timeline and begin your preparation today.
  
• Tell everyone you know (except perhaps your boss) about your dreams. Don’t be shy. They may know of an opportunity that exists that puts you on your path.
  
• Liquidate your “unnecessary stuff” and reduce all spending immediately to adequately prepare for the transition.
  
• Meet with people (over the internet perhaps) who’ve done it (in the specific or broad sense of what you plan to achieve) and learn from them.
  
  Here’s to a great life!

What Pumps You Up?

If your life were a line, such as the heart monitor, what would it look like? Does it have lots of peaks and valleys? Were there years or months when you were always up? (Up meaning on top of it all, feeling great, happy with where you were and who you were, not up as in stress level.)

Now, think about the last 6 months. Where were your peaks and valleys? What was going on? Who were you around or what were you working on?

I strongly encourage you to make the choice about how you want to live- in a peak or a valley. Recognize that it is always a choice (even if we prefer to blame it on outside circumstances). Then, take proactive steps to live in the way of your choice.

If you chose to live in a peak, or at least begin your assent, here are some recommendations:

• Choose your theme song. Something that you hear and the car accelerator goes down (not literally). You immediately get pumped up just hearing the first chord.


• Surround yourself with others who are living in peaks and stay away from those who prefer the valley (no matter who they are)


• Identify a profession or set of tasks that allow you to shine and/or challenge and conquer and/or fuel your passion, etc.... (realize how much of your life is work and how important it is that work is mostly enjoyable and keeping you in a peak)


• Have a plan for moments when a valley is around the corner- weekly yoga class, overnight retreat, friend available for dinner at your favorite restaurant, favorite exercise, etc...

How do you choose to live? How are your activities and mindset in line with that choice?

Now, put on your theme song and get ready to sour!

What Make Women Happy...

A recent poll said that the happiest women do 3 things:

• cancel appointments for more "me" time
• don't always answer their phone and
• know how to say no

I love these women. I am one of them.

You must first harness the fact that you have to be well to serve others. Well means you have to be (or should very well be) healthy, happy, vibrant, optimistic, full of hope, ready to dive into the task, etc..... Serving others is what we do in our families, relationships, with our best friends, in our community, our professional positions...

You can't serve well when you are not taking good care of yourself.

Let me say it another way, no one gets the best of you if the best isn't even available.

So, reconsider over scheduling yourself. Remember you are not in emergency services and people shouldn't be able to reach you 24/7. Voicemail is a wonderful tool. Use it! And, please if you learn only one word this year, let it be NO. Say NO to that committee, task, job, trip and YES to you.

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff.... but what is small?

We've heard it a million times, "don't sweat the small stuff!" And, I agree. But, I think its important to first examine what the small stuff means... to you, to your partner, your friends, your clients.... we may not all be on the same page as to what constitutes that famously small stuff.

What does the small stuff mean to you?

To me, the small stuff includes things like: a not-so-perfect haircut, a not-so-perfectly picked up or ultra clean house, not winning at everything, not having the BEST of some gadget, and not being so perfect. I try hard not to sweat my small stuff.

But, small stuff is pretty subjective. Your friends/partner/clients may have a different perspective of what small stuff is.

Its critical to know what matters most (and least) to those those who are important to you.

It may be super important to them that they get a call back within the hour if they leave you a message. You, on the other hand, may feel a day or two response is adequate.

You may try to avoid the small stuff by ignoring it. They may prefer to talk about the small stuff to get it out and move forward.

Think about what small stuff means to you. Don't sweat it.. for you. But, also know what it means to others so you don't lose something or someone important to you.

It is Real Simple

It is Real Simple... the magazine. I love it. I have been reading it for years.

The January issue particularly speaks to my heart as a coach. They asked women what was on their NOT-TO-DO list for 2009. Here's a sampling...

• I won't over commit.
• I'm going to stop being a people pleaser.
• I won't do office work at home on Sundays.
• I will stop saving things for special occasions.
• I will not make the same promises I have year after year. This year I'll be less judgmental, take the dog out more, and overlook my husband's inability to fold towels.

I love them! We are finally getting it! The best thing you can do for yourself, your family and your career is to STOP. Stop what you are doing. Do an analysis of what it is that you do everyday. And, then refine it to be more powerful, more productive, more meaningful, healthier, happier, etc..... (what ever it is that YOU need now) even if that means slowing down!

Enjoy your life. Don't let it slip away.

Recall Your Early Motivations to Foster Progress

As you are starting a new year, you are likely clearing out files and such from years past. I encourage you to take your time and review your early work for renewed inspiration.

If you are a business owner:
Review your thoughts, drawings, notes, emails and other work that you did before the start and in the beginning of your business (or a particular project).

If you are a student:
Review your early writings and other work.

If you are a parent:
Review your journal and/or thoughts of parenting before the children arrived.

If you are a professional:
Revisit items that talked about where you wanted the world to take you. What were your expectations and dreams before life got hectic.

The reason for you to do this is multi-fold:

• You'll revisit why you began the journey. What did you set out to do? Or Why?
• You'll see progress and change. Some you'll like and some you won't. Take this time to think about your new directions.
• You'll see your values, beliefs, and ideas at their rawest. Have they changed? Have you totally lost them?
• You'll get to slow down to evaluate the roses before moving forward. In doing so, you may choose a slightly different path.

Enjoy the adventure.

Make sure you are putting your best foot forward-for yourself- each and every day!

Winning Attributes

I've observed thousands of people over the years, as part of my work and as part of my natural interest in learning and observing behavior. I've come to identify limiting as well as successful attributes and behaviors in people. I examine and refine this list to benefit my clients as well as myself. I'll share a few examples with you today- as we prepare for our new year and to be our best selves.

Be Social- in a good and balanced way- and you'll be rewarded with great relationships
Believe it or not I was a shy child in many respects. At the age of 12 I realized that to build relationships with others you need to be social. As an only child that didn't come naturally to me. I had to work at it. And, I had to work hard to discover how to do it well and in a balanced way. I remember at one point getting it very wrong- and believing that I had to give people my toys to have them like me. There were a lot of growing pains.

Be a Great Networker to promote yourself, your business and help others
I had a friend who seemed to know everyone. She could solve any problem by picking up the phone. She was a giver. A helper. I admired her. I was in my early 20's when I met her in Philadelphia. I knew then that she was on to something with her incredible social skills. I later came to see that it was networking at its best. I mirrored her in the things she did and began to harness my own abilities as a networker.

Observe Others to be Your Best
Look to other people to see how you can improve. I'm not suggesting that you compete and compare yourself with others to the point of losing who you are- however, I am advocating that you step away from yourself to examine attributes of others that could enhance who you are. You can teach an old dog new tricks! You can become and do things that you haven't before. You can live your life the way you want to. It truly is a personal choice that you have to become the person you want to be- free of any limitations that have been set at your doorstep in days before. One small example of this is public speaking. If you would like to be better at it there are groups you can join, books you can read, coaches you can hire, etc.... Thousands of people harness this skill every year. You are no different. You can become a great speaker if you want to.

I wish you health, happiness and prosperity in 2009!

A Life Coach's Contribution to Wellness Programs

How can a life coach help my company and our employees?

As health care costs rise companies are reaching out to employees to take a greater hand in their health and related costs. Costs are expected to rise 6.8% this year and 40% of employers surveyed reported that they’ll ask employees to do more cost-sharing.1 Alternative avenues to increase health and wellness are being sought at the company level to lower health care costs while increasing employee heath and education.

Top-tier companies recognize the benefits of healthy and happy employees therefore they are inviting nutritionists, personal trainers, smoking cessation coaches and others into the workplace for the benefit of both the employee and company. These experts are being packaged in Wellness Programs and other benefits packages offered by the company for free or at a significantly reduced cost to employees. And, it’s working. The Pittsburgh Business Times reported that for every $1 that a company invested in wellness programs they received $1.65 in benefits returned.[1] Wellness programs not only save companies and individuals money (an estimated $1,476 per person), they yield additional benefits such as lower rates of absenteeism, improved morale and increased productivity.[2] When employees thrive and take ownership of their health, well being and overall success, everyone wins- including the companies employing them.

Life coaching is ideal for wellness programs and other benefits packages because it covers multiple facets of an employee’s life. Life coaches work with people on areas such as wellness and health, decision-making and relationships, workplace development, home-life balance and overall achievement in various areas of their life. Coaches have been used by leaders and executives for many years but are becoming more popular with the mainstream as they become more affordable and services are more widespread across the country.

As a life coach, I have personally helped people and businesses do the following[3]:
Organize space and tasks to be more productive – thus increasing revenue
Build better relationships with coworkers, managers and clients- strengthening reputation, increasing repeat business, optimizing working relationships and increasing revenue
Examine and identify areas lacking optimal productivity- thus increasing productivity
Increase confidence, decision-making and leadership abilities- to better serve the company, product or service and/or career elevation
Ensure that employees are thriving in both home and work arenas- a holistic approach to health and wellness achievement
Become more healthful (specifically losing weight and quitting smoking)- longevity and strengthening quality of life

Life coaching options for your company and employees may include:
A resident life coach for employee accessibility one or two days a week (in-house)
On-call coaching (by appointment) for employees during or after work hours
Monthly life coaching seminars at the office (30-60 minutes)

Financial options may include:
Company pays 100% of coaching
Company and employee share in the cost of coaching
Employees pay 100% of coaching (company provides the introduction, resource materials and perhaps meeting space)

[1] Pittsburgh Business Times. With heath care costs on rise, workers will have to shell out. February 22-28, 2008.
[2] Pittsburgh Business Times. Focus on wellness saves medical claim costs, survey finds. October 19-25, 2007.
[3] Please see my testimonials for more information as to my work with individuals and companies.

2009 Resolutions

Its just a few weeks away. 2009. Tell it what you expect of it now. Don't enter it blindly.

What do you want to accomplish in 2009?

What are your personal goals? Financial goals? Spiritual goals? Career or business goals? Heck, I even have goals for home projects. I work them into the budget and give them time lines.

What is the benefit of having goals?

It helps give structure to your life. And, most of us need and thrive on good structure. It gives us purpose and direction.

How do I stay on track?

Have all of your goals written down and review them weekly at first, then when you are on the right path, monthly. Share them with others in your life and have discussions about them. Invite others to share their goals with you. Recognize that your goals were made because they were important to you so stick with them. Don't let another year go by to find them on the list with little progress. You control the success of your goals.

Happy Goal Setting. I hope that 2009 is your best year ever!

Creating Your Plan for 2009

Now is the time to lay out your life map for 2009. Here's an quick step version of how to do that.

1. Spend some time in thought- what do you want to accomplish in 2009, why, and what are the small steps to get you there
2. Write down your goals, rationales for those goals, and timelines for the small steps
3. Tell everyone about your goals. Share your written plan with them so they can support you. Encourage them to have a plan and encourage each other.
4. You must hold yourself accountable to the steps and timelines- or find someone who will hold you accountable (remember, this is your life- don't cheat yourself out of another year)
5. Review your goals daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly and annually (depending upon how they are written)
6. Forgive yourself for minor missteps and get back on the plan immediately (we all eat a little chocolate while on a diet)
7. Reward yourself for the milestones you achieve
8. Repeat as necessary

My plan also includes data on my status; what did I accomplish this year; what attributes do I have that allow me to achieve my goals; what am I thankful for; what are my 5 year and life's goals; etc..... This is more like a report or guide versus a single piece of paper. I run my life rather than let life run me. This guide helps me do that.

Happy 2009!

When to Call it Quits

So often people continue down a path only because its familiar and comfortable. The path is often ineffective.

Are you on any paths that are not producing the results you need. Mind you, I didn't say the results you wanted. I said need.

Are you challenging yourself in life? Are you building your life (working on it, making it stronger and better) or just living it?

One example I run into frequently is in the therapeutic domain. So many people have gone to the same therapist for years- with minimal results. The most significant result is that they've built a relationship with their therapist that is comfortable. They know what to expect each time they go. They know how the conversation will go. I wholeheartedly believe in the relationship building and need for comfort in this relationship, however, I see it often prove ineffective if the goal is true therapy. The trouble rests in that most people can choose their therapist and they choose one that is easy- one that doesn't challenge them too much. One that agrees with them. It allows them to feel as though they are trying. "Hey, I go to therapy." But, is the therapy effective or is it just a routine? Very few people will continue to go down a difficult path if they can switch to one that is easier.

As a life coach, I often see people who say they want to make some changes but they really don't want to put the effort in. Or, they don't want to put forth the resources that is required to make the changes they want. Its just lip service. They are not ready. But, the only one they let down is themself. Don't be one of these peole. Take control of your life today. Take responsibility for the way that its turning out. Make tomorrow what you want of it. You don't have to do it alone but it may not always be a path of roses either. Grab the rope and hang on- let go when I tell you.

Keep in mind that you have ~85 years in this life to make it worthwhile. Some of those years are already spent. So, what do you plan to do with what is left? Challenge yourself- in all domains. Show us what you are made of.

Some ways to challenge yourself:

• Take a trip by yourself for at least 5 days- ideally in another country
• Take a weekend or week long workshop on something totally new to you
• Discover a new hobby (one that you have dreamed of but thought was impossible for you)
• Revisit what you do for a living and consider a significant change for the better
• Go get the degree you've always wanted
• Write your own memoir in 60 days

Gain Some Perspective

I'm going to share a story with you that unfolded just yesterday.

I had a business lunch on my calendar for a few weeks. My lunch date was a woman who I adore as both a friend and a master business leader in our area. I love the time we spend together. Its often filled with wild ideas- neither of us put limits on each other- and bright visions of the future and the work we can do together. We don't spend time ho humming about the economy or in the doom and gloom conversation I often hear others engaged in.

So, there I waited at our scheduled destination. I somehow knew I would remain by myself.

I tried to remember if I had confirmed. I thought I had but yet couldn't find the message on my blackberry.

I had recalled getting an email from her to the masses a few days earlier about her daughter- but she often sends them so I didn't rush to open it. It would have to wait, along with a few hundred others, that came in and were not a top priority (or so I thought).

I know something is wrong as 10 minutes have passed, pass the time we were scheduled to meet. She is not one to be late. I emailed her.

She emailed me promptly back from her iPhone and told me that she was in the hospital with her daughter- who had been there for 4 days and is expected to be there another 8 or 21 more.

We talked at some length. I offered to pull an overnight duty if she needed a break. It was the least that I could do.

I felt terrible. I was so caught up in every day business that I failed to take 30 seconds to open an email from a friend.

Life sometimes gets the best of us. It had got the best of me this week. I had 12 speaking engagements, client meetings and the usual business events to attend. And, I was wildly enthusiastic about my business brainstorming with a dear girlfriend. But business isn't the be-all-end-all in life. Life is more than that.

I think about my superstar business girlfriend overseeing her daughter in the hospital and am reminded that THAT is what life is about. Being there for those we love.

Reading to Guide You

Clients and friends often ask my advice on reading materials for various outcomes. Here are my general thoughts.

I highly encourage you to be a active member of any national or international groups in your profession. Pick only one and become a part of it. Make sure they deliver at least monthly news from the field (peer reviewed ideally)- what is working, what's not, and what is on the cutting edge. Remember that your education shouldn't stop at any point in your successful career. You should be at the height of up-to-date knowledge in your field, know the key players well, and contribute to the information sharing.

As a business person I subscribe to Inc., Fast Company, Entrepreneur, and Forbes Magazines. I subscribe to a few others but have to confess that they don't excite me very much. Forbes, is in fact on the lower side of enjoyment for me, but I love the Executive Women issues that come out seasonally.

Read for education, inspiration, enjoyment for the field and to break away from the normal day-to-day stuff. Your brain needs it. Your business needs it.

Oh, and for pleasure, I subscribe to Cooking Light and Real Simple. They just make my life better.

I encourage you to comment on your own reading lists (books, blogs, magazines, etc...).

Happy Reading!

What is Your Formula?

I hear it often. "Lisa, how did you do that?" That question is one of the pivotal keys to my becoming a life coach. I wanted to help others "do that"- whatever that was for them.

People are often disappointed with me when I can't answer them the way they want. They are looking for a course that I took, a book I read, an experience I had- that they can replicate to do the same thing. It just doesn't work that way.

Its like asking a painter how they paint or how they become inspired. Its a really hard question to answer.

Or, asking the engineer to explain how they are doing their work- it would take hours, days and maybe weeks. If they give you the broad answer you might be unhappy- you want more- yet you don't want to spend the 4+ years in education that they did learning their trade.

I often say, "that's just who I am and what I do". That isn't good enough for them. They want more. I understand that.

The truth is it comes naturally for me- because of my formula.

I get paid to give advice. And, I'd like to say that I think my advice is spot on at least 90% of the time. How do I derive at such advice- that is successful? Well, the answer is in my formula. We all have one.

The formula includes my 18 years of formal education, the dozens of various courses I took outside of that; my 23 years work experience (yes, I've been working since the age of 12) for small shops and large corporations; my upbringing and background; my voracious learning, observation and reading; my methodology for decision making and processing; the company I keep; my beliefs; my values; my creativity; ..... you see where this is going. Who I am is how I work. A simple answer doesn't exist to "how I do it".

What's your formula? How do you do what you do?

Choosing the Best Life for Yourself: 5 Tips

What are 5 things I can do today to improve my life?

(I'm glad you asked.)

1. Get a library card and go- each week
Read. Read. Read. And, hang out with people who do.

2. Turn off the TV with very few exceptions
Watch what really matters to you- and limit the time you do so to no more than 30 minutes a day.

3. Spend time each day evaluating who you are and where you want to go
Meditate. Give thanks. Reach far. Dare to dream. Inspire others. Find your inspiration.

4. Take pride in what you look and feel like
Fix yourself. Clean yourself up. Stop smoking. Walk daily. Wear only what fits and looks good. Allow your appearance and self care to open doors for you.

5. Choose your associates carefully
We are who we keep. Rid yourself of drama and negative filled people. Choose those you want to spend time with and love. Make sure they contribute to your life in a good way - and you do the same for them.

Live well. Live better.

If you like this blog, join my electronic monthly newsletter- Living Better Newsletter. Each month we have offers for members (membership is free), tips on living better, and other good things for your life. Enjoy.

Thank you for making my blog a part of your week. I blog every Monday and Friday- unless I'm on travel.

Lisa

For 10 Minutes Do What You Want

I'd like you to close your door. Turn off all sounds. And, think.

Think of what you'd do today if you had 10 million in the bank.

What would your day look like?

Really think about this for 10 minutes. How would you live?

Now, ask 4 friends or colleagues the same question- today.

Email me your answers at lspahr@spahrconsulting.com

"I'll do that later." The Procrastinator's Theme

This week I was at a corporation delivering a talk on stress reduction. An employee approached me and asked what advice I have for the chronic procrastinator.

If you have trouble "doing something now" and always seem to "put off til tomorrow.... or tomorrow's tomorrow..." here are a few simple suggestions to getting it done.

List those things you are putting off.
List those things you'll do right away (scheduling a spa day, grabbing lunch, hitting the happy hour circuit, etc...)
Assign a pairing of something you put off and something you have no problem doing such as... I will make 5 calls and THEN I can go to lunch.
Or, make it a string of things to do before enjoying a pleasurable item or event ... I will do three things (list them specifically) on my list before I get to schedule my weekend.

Be disciplined. Be on top of all of the things on your list- including those you don't like.

Don't put off til tomorrow those things you've been doing so for a month. Drop it completely or get it done.

Save Yourself. Turn the TV Off. ... at least more often

One of the things I notice, changing about myself as I age, is my distaste for television and for people who spend hours watching it.

I've been there. I was the little kid who watched a lot of TV. I was the adult that would eat in front of the TV, as a single person living in an apartment. I would occasionally get caught up in sitcoms and drama series and watch as though it was a scheduled part of my day.

Then I realized that year after year the plots changed ever so slightly but I was in the same place. My growth and development, personally and/or professionally, was not enhanced one ounce by spending so much time watching television.

In my Dan Kennedy education I've learned about a quote that I've come to embody, "Poor people have big TVs; Rich people have big libraries." I believe it.

I advocate more reading, more socializing, more walks- less TV. When you do watch TV make it educational or TRUE entertainment once in a while. Don't allow it to take up more time than a part-time job with zero yield.

Revising the Plans of Life

I can recall being a teenager and laying out some of my future plans. Ironically, college wasn't one of them for this small-town south central PA girl. Falling in love was- to a gorgeous and hard working perfect man. I was also planning to have two children by the time I was 28.

"Wow," is all that I can say when I think back to that plan. Maybe a little "what was I thinking?" too.

Fast forward almost 20 years. I'm 34 (35 next month). I've completed both college and graduate school and have a resume that is 2 pages, condensed. The children never came along. And the perfect man hasn't either. I've realized perfection was a bit far fetched. (smile)

I've watched dear friend realize my original plan. And, I've had the pleasure to live vicariously through them- as they have through me on my very different journey.

I believe planning is great. I think goals drive us to live better. I also believe we can be headed down a path that isn't right for us at times. A wise person will analyze their plan for appropriateness at regular intervals. Is is still the right way to go? Why or why not? Revise when and if necessary.

Don't fail to realize when your path needs readjustments. Don't get caught up in "oh, but for 10 years I've wanted this, so it HAS to happen....". Be smarter than that. Stubbornness and laziness will lead you to fail every time. Don't confuse being driven, goal oriented and focused with being resistant to diversions. A great person who is all of those things also has the ability to revisit the plan, revise and reset the path.

At 34 I dedicated myself to revisiting the more social aspects of my life (versus academic and professional). I'm delighted each day I get to walk in my new path- that came a few decades behind my original plan.

Have fun with your path. Don't take it too seriously that you fail to see the larger pictures.

Turning Trouble Into Gold

You can't hide from Michael Phelps mania. And, you shouldn't want to. He's a star!

The lesser known story of how he got into swimming, however, is equally fascinating. As a youth, Michael's mom found him to have far more energy than other youth. She couldn't fill his time with the right activities to keep him engaged and satisfied. He was diagnosed with a hyperactivity disorder.

She enrolled him in swim class. Soon after his coach came to her and said he has Olympic potential and he'd (coach) like to work with him more. And, here we are 8 gold medals later.

What I love about this story is not only the hope he gives to all of us for achieving our dreams- but the hope his story gives to us for turning difficulties into vehicles to shine.

What are your challenges? How can you turn them into success?